On September 20, 2024, I will turn 40 years old.
Time flies when you’re… a kid? A teenager? An adult? Having fun? Not having fun?
Life just keeps moving, regardless of what we are doing. I always tell people, “The good and bad thing about time is that it will keep moving. It will never stand still.”
When life is good, and you’re living in the moment, you wish to freeze time. Unfortunately, we sometimes are so focused on what will happen in the future, during the aforementioned “moment-in-time,” that we miss out on the present.
We then regret what we missed out on. The “coulda-woulda-shoulda” reflections kick in.
On the reverse, when our present is so dire, that life drags and we just want it to end, time is of great value. It will pass. Time will not stop, and therefore, we want to look forward to the future. We need to, more or less. This too shall pass.
I’ll be 40 years old soon. Time f’ing flies. I have more moments in my life than I can count that have been downright horrendous, and the same goes for great ones, as well.
I feel like I have had my mid-life crisis a few times in life. I have started over with jobs, careers, where I live, what I buy, whom I see or hang out with, and even dated numerous times. I have fallen victim to the annual “new year, new me” mantra probably a dozen times.
I also ramble on a lot. Or so my wife tells me. This article is geared towards myself, and my thoughts, but something I think we should all pose to ourselves.
My point is this; I will turn 40 years old soon, and I don’t know how to feel. Is this good? Is this bad? I cannot go back in time. I cannot freeze time, just as I cannot fast-forward it, either.
What have I done with my life thus far? What else am I capable of? Who am I? What do I want to become?
All I can do is enjoy the moment for what it is. I’ve lived a long life, in my eyes. I’ve lived to tell a thousand tales, and through moments that others have not made it from.
I have moments from my twenties that I cringe at now, just as I have moments I am proud of. During my thirties, I have resurrected a lot of who I once was, into the man I am today. I learned that I can never go back, only look (and move) forward.
On September 20, 2024, I will have lived 40 years on this Earth. God willing, I will have another 40. For now, though, at this moment, right here, I cannot worry about the first 40, just as I cannot worry about the next 40.
I have to spend my time doing the best I can, with what I have. And that’s all any of us can do, at any given moment.
I have 1.5 months to go. It’s closing time, Noah. Last call to live out the rest of my thirties.
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Life, Death, and Everything in Between. 